Red Sox-Yankees

Stream of consciousness from the Sox-Yankees spring training game.  Here's where it will start:

I'm startled.  Big Fat Bartolo doesn't look so fat anymore.  He handled the Sox 1-2-3 in the first.  I'm gonna be really angry if Bartolo somehow works out for the Yankees.  Good thing I don't have a car, or else God knows I'd be driving angry.

Mayor Bubbles is homeless.  Someone should give him a job as the public address announcer at City of Palms Park.  That way he wouldn't have to steal so many discmen (discmans?).  I'm still bitter there was no Mayor Bubbles spin-off show (one of the Contributor's better ideas).  Maybe it could have been a reality show where Bubbles tries to steal copper wire from construction sites all over the world.  But I suppose since Bubbles isn't a real person, a reality show is a bit of a stretch.  How about, seeing the success of Bubbles' grocery cart convenience store, the owner of a big box retailer like WalMart makes Bubbles acting CEO.  Or after seeing the King's Speech, Bubbles goes to England to get his stutter fixed.  The possibilities are endless. Lets get on this as a people.

Speaking of the Contributor, he's right now trying to come up with pick-up lines for seniors...in high school.  His best- "So you're a senior...I am too...can I get you a virgin strawberry daiquiri?".  Looks like we're in for a real good night.  And he keeps saying that Sox shortstop prospect Iglesias is smoove.  I wonder if he also has big balls, Larry.  

ALSO: What subset of humanity waits two weeks with multiple craps festering in a clogged toilet before calling a plumber? Come On. This has gone too far.

More to come.